Quiz Show Hilarity

Blogger’s note: This blog post deals with a serious topic in a not-so-serious manner. To have the best reading experience, use your “theater of the mind” to imagine that you are watching a television game show.

(Booming announcer voice): Ladies and gentleman, this … is … (not) Jeopardy! (Cue cheesy theme music)

Please welcome today’s contestants. (Applause)

Our first contestant is Jack! (Applause) Jack is “salty” and claims to understand what a conspiracy theory is. (Laugh track)

Our second contestant is well known in many circles as Steve, Robert Armstrong, Adam Baum, and—last, but not least—Dundalk Donnie! (Applause) “DD,” as we’ll call him, claims to be from Dundalk, though this has never actually been proven. (Laugh track)

And our third and final constant is Matthew! (Applause) Matthew is at the forefront of creating a better Dundalk, even though the facts indicate otherwise. (Laugh track)

The category for today’s game is the DRC. For those of you that are new to the program, DRC stands for the Dundalk Renaissance Corporation—a 501(C3) nonprofit organization.

Before we get to our questions, let’s pause for a brief commercial message:

“The Green Turtle wishes to thank Governor Martin O’Malley and Treasurer Nancy K. Kopp for the generous $240,000 land (funded by the taxpayers), as well as other goodies provided by the county. Free drinks on the taxpayers, so we guess they aren’t technically free!”

(Cheesy theme music) Welcome back. Now, here are our questions for this game:

1.       In what year did the DRC have to move from its old office space?

2.       How much renovation went on just prior to that move, and who paid for it?

3.       What mistake (if any) led to that move?

4.       Does Chief Johnson live in the house he has listed on the county financial disclosure form, since—according to BGE, the electric usage doesn’t indicate that the residence is occupied?

5.       What top law enforcement official in the county made the statement that the chief lives on a boat in the county, despite the fact that is not listed anywhere in the financial disclosure form?

6.       How many investigations are ongoing in Baltimore County?

7.       Who was the councilman who chose not to vote for the Yorkway project?

8.       What other councilman said he/she would not and then did anyway?

9.       Who signed off on the funding for the project?

10.       Is the $500 million Fort Howard project still moving forward, and who is behind it?

Contestants, those are today’s questions. Let’s see who hits the buzzer (no pun intended) first. (Laugh track)

Contestants, please provide your answers in the comments section. That way, the answers will be those of the contestants and not the blogger. Also, please try not to overload the system with your insightful, accurate, and truthful responses. Finally, it is required to provide some documentation or other form of verification/evidence for your answers. (Dave, here is your chance to set the record straight.)

Good luck to all!

(Cue pensive thinking music)