Payback

Let’s write a little ditty, shall we?

“A couple of ‘bars’ of a ‘cash’ tune and the County pays its tab…”

Who writes this kind of stuff? Me, for sure. But I’m not going to record that tune, because I’m on the sidelines calling the play by play.

However, someone else’s fingers are tap, tap, taping away over this. 

Does anyone remember Lois Lane from the Daily Planet? I do, and I must say that Alison Knezevich of the Baltimore Sun sure looks like Lois Lane but acts like the famous journalist (from my favorite movie of all time) All the President’s Men, Bob Woodward.

Maybe in this case we could call Alison “Ms. Woodward?”

Anyone who has been following the Kamenetz/Homan follies and the retiree health care case now knows where everything stands. You remember that mess—the one where the judge threatened the county bean counters with time in the hoosegow for (would you believe it) CONTEMPT!

Even Poligrip couldn’t stop their teeth from rattling over that one.

So, if you’ve been following the story in the news, then you’ve seen the name Alison Knezevich.

I met Alison over a story we both were writing about, and we wound up crossing paths searching for the preverbal smoking gun. So, to help each other out, we set up a meeting to discuss.  

As we sat down at the table at my now deceased mom’s house (centrally located for both of us), I had my binder marked with tabs and she had her pile of notes and such scattered about.

When she remarked, “You’re so organized while I’m…,” I immediately thought of “Wood/Stein,” which was a pet name the Washington Post’s Editor Ben Bradley gave the duo of Woodward and Bernstein during the Watergate scandal.

Now, for those of you that don’t know your history (like these UM students – watch this, it’s a hoot, although a disgrace for UM), Bob Woodward was a bit disorganized, despite being a Pulitzer Prize winning reporter.

Now to the “guts” of this tale. Public awareness is high regarding the County’s bean counters—who overcooked this mess, meaning they abused the taxpayers of Baltimore County with their arrogance by the old “if we appeal them to death they will go away” or “who cares what the judge said; we are the kings of the of the hill.”

A funny thing happened, though—they ran into a judge, Michael Finifter (my hero), who they couldn’t BS. Also, Judge Finifter was not interested in playing any stupid games and, ultimately, he laid down the law.

Now, for my final analysis, it seems that the county bean counters were actually full of gas, which can be a huge problem for those afflicted with the condition. Especially under stress of jail time or, as Alison’s quote aptly describes, their intestinal fortitude:

“That threat ‘created severe anxiety and personal distress for those officials and their families,’ wrote Assistant County Attorney James J. Nolan Jr. in court documents submitted Friday. Nolan wrote that the payment is ‘solely the result of the coercion and duress’ over the jail threat.”

So, in the interest of justice and intestinal fortitude, we learned that the threat of incarceration can give one the clarity needed to let things go (in this instance, the numerous appeals). As taxpayers, we get to save some of those overcooked beans before they explode.

Of course, we lost a lot of beans by having things go on for so long, but I wasn’t going to mention that.

Kudos for the judge for seeing through all of the games and setting things straight, so to speak, by scaring the County bean counters and muckity mucks straight.

As for those aforementioned County folks, hopefully their duress has settled. If not, maybe I could offer them some Beano…